Thursday, January 20, 2011
I don't know what to title this blog post !?
Well where to begin ? I am currently on CD 15 which means I'm ovulating more than likely. I don't waste my $$$ on OPKs because they have been wrong for me in the past & I decided it just wasn't worth it. I have 4 $tree tests & 3 digital EPT certainty tests :| I've decided to not actively TTC anymore. (Cody has a whole diff story but he can keep it to himself lol) It is wayy too stressful & takes too much out of me & it's starting to put a strain on my marriage. TTC just isn't worth my family falling apart. I have an amazing husband & son who love me & I just need to be happy with that. I am blessed. There are alot of women who deserve a child more than I do. I'm not saying that I don't WANT anymore because of course I still do. & I'm not saying we will be preventing in anyway. I'm just not going to stress or bother about it. Makes the sex more fun that way anyways, lol. TTC has flooded my life for the past 22 months & I can't do that anymore. I have gained sooooo much weight & I know most of it's from my PCOS but alot is also stress related. Since I haven't been so worried about it I have lost 10 lbs !! & I feel soo much better. My metabolism is speeding up, I'm not as depressed. Everythings just workin for me this way. AF is due around February 1-5 (depending on if I'm on a 28 or 31 da cycle) but I'm not testing until 2.9.11 that's Braylon's bday & I'll be soo distracted that day that IF I were to get a bfn it wouldn't bother me so much,but I'm feeling bfp ferrr sureee. Lol. & just so everyone knows..telling me that you agree will probably make me cry bc it's like your telling me you agree that I'm selfish. I kind felt hurt by everyone who "liked" my status update last night but ohh well, I'm a big girl. Anywaysss toodles. :)
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isn't it nice when you get your "ah-ha" moment. i too finally had this one day where i realized it was too much stress and worry and i'm just going to let it be. when it happens, it happens and i'm not going to try to force it
ReplyDeletegood for you girl and it WILL happen one day when you least expect it<3
I don't think that you are selfish and no matter how many babies u have you still deserve to have ur dreams come true. Ur a good person. And I admit I was one who liked ur status last night but the part that I liked about it was when u said that u were extrely happy with your life and that u were happy god chose you to be his mommy. He is a beautiful little boy and u deserve many many more.love u girl.
ReplyDeleteI'm super glad I didn't like that status =S! Sometimes I like the wrong statuses.
ReplyDeleteAnyways. I think this will be good for you. It sucks how ttc kinda tends to take over our lives and makes sex more of a chore than anything else. I want to see you happy. You deserve happiness. I'll still be crossing my fingers for this month for you though ;)